You don’t need to read this if you don’t coach, consult, or advise others.
What I’m about tell you is something I have mentioned before in a few of my presentations. The simple fact is that most of us will never change. Of the ones that try to change, even fewer will be successful when it comes to really big break throughs.
For example, if we rated everyone on a scale of 1-10 on their level of success, happiness, and ability to make great things happen we could make everyone a number.
What you would then find is that someone rated a 5 might become a 6 or 7, but they will probably never be an 8 or 9. Someone that is a 3 might become a 5 or 6 but probably never become a 7 or 8…and so on. Please keep in mind that I am just playing the odds here.
Now there are some exceptions to the rule. These exceptions might exclude younger people from my formula. Teenagers and even people in their early twenties still have a lot of time to evolve and are more likely to change. Unfortunately the older you get, the more set in your ways you become.
Another exception could be a major life event or a series of major life events like death in the family, bankruptcy, and divorce. These could all be times in ones life that might trigger drastic change for the better. Of course, they could also trigger drastic changes for the worse.
My uncommon coaching trick is to be able to scientifically or even intuitively know roughly where people stand in life and how to then set my expectations accordingly. Terrible, I know.
But by knowing that Rome wasn’t built in a day, that I need to pick my battles for changes, and that the person I am working with may never want to, nor need to, become a super achiever is extremely helpful.
By all means I will push, challenge, and coach people at any level they desire, but to expect every client to be the next Oprah, Trump, or Kim Kardashian (who made $80 million again last year) is kind of ridiculous.
Call me a jerk. Tell me I shouldn’t make people a number. Opt-out and never read one of my posts again…but what I am telling you will help you and your clients find meaningful success and happiness.
Find and focus on easy wins and achievable goals, and then gain momentum from there. It’s better than the big let downs that come from promising people the unnecessary and impossible.